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People of InfluenceJessica Jagod, Busy Mother and Local Leader
kind enough to answer several questions about motherhood and leadership. Max-Influence.com thanks her for her time, insight, and willingness to share. We hope our readers are challenged, encouraged, and enriched. We invite you to let us know how these articles have impacted your own walk toward greater influence. Max-I: Very rarely does society view motherhood as a leadership role. What qualities of motherhood do you see as vital to effective leadership? Jessica: It's ironic because I worked in corporate America in varying leadership roles for five years prior to having children. During my career outside the home, I assumed I was using most of my potential and skills. Was I ever wrong! Leadership starts with a sense of humility and service. One of the first acts as a mother is recognizing that caring for another human being is a complete act of service. I was a mom literally thrown into a situation where I had no idea what I was doing. That was truly humbling. God had my heart right where it needed to be. From that point on I grew into a family leader. My responsibilities as a mother-leader are: creating a vision for our family life, coordinating and executing our time and talents for the Lord, our family, our church and friends, overseeing the education of three children, home management, and finally, leading our children to Christ and intentionally training them to have character in their lives. Max-I: As a mother of a special-needs child, what leadership qualities has the demands of your situation instilled in you? Jessica: I have learned resourcefulness, patience, flexibility and endurance. I can't say I have perfectly mastered these skills, I am still in the process. However, looking back, I can say I have grown tremendously in those areas since I first started raising children. Children with special needs can take parents to very hard places emotionally, physically, spiritually, and financially. The Lord has strengthened my character through trials and difficult circumstances. Finally, he has taught me a great leadership skill through this situation: surround yourself with people who will support you and ask for help when you need it. Max-I: Many do not talk about love and leadership together. Do you see love as being a necessary trait of leadership. If yes, why? Jessica: Jesus Christ is our best example of love and leadership. When He washed his followers feet, he was demonstrating His great love for them. To lead we must serve. To effectively serve, the right motivations must drive our service. There are several leadership styles out there. Domineering styles of leadership may appear to work, however, I don't believe such leaders are necessarily leading. To pour into someone else's life, to build them and help them be all they can be is the style I most appreciate. Max-I: If you could say one thing to a woman considering having children, what would it be? Jessica: Be prepared for the unexpected. Motherhood is an entirely new stage of life that requires a lot of self-sacrifice and a new appreciation for leaning on the Lord's direction. Motherhood is the hardest -- and most fulfilling -- thing I have ever done. Max-I: Do you have any practical advice for women who are torn between the demands of a career and the responsibilities of motherhood? Jessica: Each family is different. Some ladies have to work to put food on the table. God bless them. I would encourage them to be connected in a church so they can get additional support. I can speak for me in terms of the career choice. I believe there are seasons in life for working outside the home. I can't think of a higher calling or more purposeful career than investing your life into your children. For those moms who choose both, I would encourage them to recognize the difficulty of doing all things well. Something, at some point, has to give. Try to balance life as much as possible and decide what your true priorities are. Max-I: Do you have any practical suggestions for mothers who need to unwind and relax? Jessica: Scrapbook! Scrapbook! Scrapbook! Seriously, find a hobby you love and make time for yourself. Schedule time in your planner if you have to. Girl's nights, hobbies, exercising, women's conferences and studying the Bible can be great ways to refresh you physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Max-I: The family is a team. Like all teams, families must act according to certain rules in order to be effective. Do you have any advice for those mothers who struggle with disobedient and rebellious children? Jessica: First and foremost, Pray!! Dr. James Dobson uses the analogy of shopping baskets at the supermarket. When we shop, sometimes we pick a cart and it runs smoothly and turns nicely. With this cart, it's easy to go up and down the aisles. Other times, we pick carts that have a bum wheel and no matter how many times we try to move the cart in one direction it fights us to move into another. Honestly, our family struggles in this area. We have several bumpy-wheeled children. The Lord has taught us a few things. Yes, there are guidelines and good principles in books, but there is nothing better than getting ideas from the Lord to address a certain issue. Second, be intentional about parenting. My husband and I have gone to seminars, read books and sought council from other wise parents and professionals. Always have a plan in place to be ready when the chaos starts. Finally, don't give up. Rome was not built in a day. However slow our progress may be, we have to perservere in shaping our children's character without killing their spirit. Max-I: If there was only one more thing you could tell your children, what would it be? Jessica: No matter what circumstance comes your way in life, seek Jesus. Believe and follow Him and He will guide your paths. Max-I: Do you have a comforting word for those women who want to have children but cannot? Jessica: It's difficult for a mother to truly comfort another woman who cannot have children of her own. I am not in a place to understand the difficulty and frustration of her situation. It would be insulting to such women to say otherwise. With that being said, adoption is a beautiful choice. Knowing there is some child out there that God hand-picked for your family is an exciting miracle. I would also say to these women that God loves you and He has specific plans for your life. Joshua 1:9 is very encouraging: "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."
Points of Influence For Our Readers 1. True leadership starts with humility and service. Questions to consider: A. Can you honestly say that humility and service are your starting points as a leader? B. What is stopping you from leading others through humble service? C. Do you see and understand the practical value of leading others through humble service? D. Is there anything about the concept of the leader as servant which frightens you? What is it and why do you think it's so frightening? 2. Humility is a learned trait. As leaders, we learn humility as we are forced to recognize and admit our own weaknesses and limitations. We are forced to admit these things as new events and new responsibilities present themselves in the course of living. Every change requires a new way of thinking. Humility empowers the leader to positively respond to change in order to lead others through change. Questions to consider: A. Are you learning humility? B. What recent life-changes have forced you to admit your own limitations? C. As a leader, are you willing to humbly embrace change in order to effectively lead others? D. Is your self-esteem healthy enough for you to honestly admit your own weaknesses and limitations? 3. Effective leaders surround themselves with helpful and supportive people. Effective leaders also know when to ask for help. Question to consider: A. As a leader, when was the last time you said, "I don't know, but could you help me find the answer? 4. Effective leaders balance priorities. Questions to consider: A. What priorities are you ignoring? B. What so-called priorities could be done away with? C. Why are you unwilling to give up those things which are unimportant? D. What value-system helps guide you as you define your priorities? E. Those things we consider important help define what our lives stand for. What would others say about your life and what's important to you? 5. Leaders, in order to remain effective and avoid burnout, know when to relax and have fun. 6. Leaders know that progress is sometimes slow. The responsibility of the leader during these times is perserverance, courage, patience, and gentleness. It does no good to crush people -- and their sometimes slow progress -- by the blow of our unkind impatience. 7. Effective leaders create anchors in the lives of those being led. These anchors are reference points of hope that will always encourage and strengthen during times of hardship and uneasiness. Questions to consider: A. As a leader, are you creating anchors in the lives of your people. B. As a leader, do you encourage your people to seek out thier own anchors of hope? C. Do you have a personal anchor which keeps you unmoved in the stormy seas of life? 8. Effective leaders only speak about what they are familiar with. Questions to consider: A. When was the last time you felt obligated to discuss something you knew little about simply because you were the leader? B. Are you comfortable deferring your answer to someone else of better authority even if you're the leader? C. Why do you believe many have come to the conclusion that the leader should have all the answers? 9. Mothers are important, influential leaders of the home. Questions to consider: A. As a husband and father, are you communicating to your children how important your wife is to the health of the home? B. As a husband, are you communicating to your wife how important she is to you and your children? C. As a mother, are you leading through humble service? D. As a mother, are you communicating to your son or daugther the importance of the mother's role in the home? E. Are you willing to forgive yourself if you have struggled to live-out the example of a humble, positive, influential servant-leader?
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